Post Partum Psychosis

Post partum pyshcosis is an acute but terrifying condition that is caused by childbirth. This post is not to diagnose or treat. If you are feeling depressed with a new baby, or are having irrational thoughts, or thoughts of harming yourself or others seek medical help right away.

I suffered from post partum psychosis and on one of the last days of August of this year, I was found to be delusional and manic which resulted in a nine day hospitalization. My children were taken from me and my husband has turned on me. The most recent events of this summer will be shared, in due time, and to the best of my ability.

Ready to be a little scared? Cause I want to show you the scary reality of delusions, separation, mental health, and marriage discourse. I hope to illustrate the pain of post partum motherhood for you.

I will start with this little mental image of what I currently feel: I feel like I’m stuck in a spider’s web that I didn’t see coming as I rounded the corner of the house. Like the spider web is clinging to my face, nose, cheeks, throat. Like it’s in my hair. But I must have the patience to pull off each silky strand, examine it, and release it into the breeze. Or it will never get off. And, I think, there’s already a spider on top of me.

If you, or someone you know, is suffering with their mental health please seek treatment. And I will be updating this post with the information of national or local entities that help with mental illness. If you know of some good ones, drop a comment with the info. Thank you.

Published by

Alexandra A

I'm just a skinny girl with a lot of hair and a couple of stories. I'm 26, married, and have two very active, sparkly-eyed babies. My mother lives with me so I've got my best ally and source of wisdom here, too. Everything I do is for my family. We like to garden, paint, start projects, read, and watch a little bit of Netflix. I'm working on my cooking, parenting with patience, and learning how to love life where I'm at. Though I've abandoned my degree three times in two different states (yes, I said three times), I have listened and watched and picked up a couple of tips. Most of what I write is entirely non-fictional because I let life spin the tales. I'm ready to learn more and am excited to meet others on the same path. This is to serve as a record of what I've done. All pictures have been taken by me, unless otherwise credited.